My wailing has turned into dancing.
Quite fed up, I sat on my bed and didn't know what to do. I was restless, but lazy. I figured I should open God's Word because I hadn't done so in a while. I really had no idea where to turn in the book, but then I remembered that it was the 30th so I went to Psalm 30. This is what I do when I can't decide on what book to read in the Bible.
The first verses that came to my attention were:
"What is gained if I am silenced,
if I go down to the pit?"
I had have been job searching for the past month, and for those of you who have done this, you know how infuriating the process can be. I have been straining and straining, spending money to apply to places, most of which don't even call back. Either I am a crummy prospect or job searching sucks extraordinarily. Why am I so fixed on getting a job? So I can pay for rent, so I can live here and go to school. But this verse really grounded me and it as if God was saying "Remember if you aren't striving for the right reasons, all of this effort is for nothing." When we get to heaven, Jesus isn't going to be like, so while you were searching for a job, did you get one? No. He's going to ask "Were you honouring me in the process? Were your efforts for a righteous end?".
The second verses that came to my attention were:
"You turned my wailing into dancing;
you removed my sackcloth and clothed me with joy,
that my heart may sing your praises and not be silent.
Lord my God, I will praise you forever."
God really brought shook me up and said "Remember when I delivered you before? Why wouldn't I do this now?" Job or no job, God will always have me where he wants me. He has turned my wailing into dancing. Whether its a silly job search, or the suffering of losing a loved one. He's there, and turning ashes into beauty! Look at us!
I know it wasn't much. Just a simple reminder of how God provides. God bless.